Dating Language Forecasts: 1.Man gets in car without opening door for woman - no foreplay. 2.Can't hail a cab.- impotent. 3.Insists on going to a brand new restaurant - prefers virgins. 4.Insists on going to a brand new restaurant but gets lost on the way - is a virgin. 5. Takes too long deciding what to order - has trouble reaching orgasm.
The wedding date was set and the groom's three pals -- a carpenter, an electrician and a dentist -- were deciding what pranks to play on the couple on their wedding night. The carpenter figured that sawing the slats of their bed would give them a chuckle or two. The electrician decided to wire the bed -- with alternating current, of course. The dentist wore a sly grin and promised it would be memorable. A few days later, each of the groomsmen received the following note: "Dear Friends, we didn't mind the bed slats being sawed. The electric shock was only a minor setback. But I swear to God almighty, I'm going to kill whoever put novacaine in the K-Y Jelly!"
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